While CharLee was at school today I listened to a BYU program on autism. I began thinking about when CharLee was 2-3yrs and finding out he was or had autistic tendencies. I remember feeling overwhelmed and broken hearted for his future, and I remember being naive to it all in a way. I really wanted to believe that there was nothing different about my first son I was so closely bonded with. I could not see it as clearly because he did respond to me; unlike others who were trying to connect. I also remember his tutors in California telling me I must be inspired because of how he reacts with me. I did feel Heavenly Father guided and gave that connection. Now that I have little Isabeau and realizing what is so called "normal" ,I can see why loved ones were concerned. I vividly remember knowing with out a doubt that he would progress and live a normal life and for that matter have a brilliance about his "differences." Last night I went in to his SEP with his school teacher. She sat I, Matthew and CharLee down and then went on to say he was a perfect student in every way and was even 4 levels ahead in areas 4 years ago there were concerns. I know Heavenly Father has blessed him and us in ways we might not even understand. I am so incredibly grateful and in awe of my children, coming into a world of so much confusion. I pray I can be the Mother and guidance they will need to succeed , in whatever capacity. I feel inadequate at times, and so put my whole trust in our Father that he will guide me as a perfect tool in mothering these precious spirits.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Posted by Matthew Lisonbee at 9:09 PM